He was 19 when he died in 2008
Shot to death by a 15-year-old
Eager to express and act his rage
And make an unimpressive impression
On the hood and city at large
The bullet that tore his victim’s heart apart
Broke and bled his mother’s too
Surely as wrong follows right
I worked beside her at the hospital
And listened to her for a hundred life-shocked hours
Turning the events of that night
Over and over and over again in her insane-pained brain
Trying to figure out something beyond impossible
Why her son was in the park that late
Who took him there when where why why why what ah what the fuck
Not able to outrun the fatal bullet dodging through the dark
Thinking of him lying there cold and dead overnight
Cops on the beat not doing their job should have found him earlier
Should have checked the place but didn’t get out of the car
She frowned and said to me:
“To them he was, excuse my language, just another dead n…”
She stopped short she couldn't even say the word
And then she stopped herself drew back to dignity
And back to choppy internal emotional storms to come
There were no words I could say that would bring her son back
She said to me one time as I nearly cried at her torrents of torment
Told me of her 14-year-old daughter tossing through horror-scratched dreams
Mother not wanting to get close to her not have her hold her hug her
In case she lost her only surviving child as well
She couldn’t handle the thought of that much pain again
She brought in the autopsy report to work
She showed it to me
I don’t know why
I read it too
I don’t know why
It seemed like a insult not to
He lay dead overnight and there were fly-eggs in his hair
Motherfucker nature already doing her pitiless degrading work
On another black casualty of the senseless teenage Chicago street-gun war
I went to the viewing of the body
Looking strange like a waxwork figure somehow
Big gold watch and chains and white suit
Candidate for a job interview in the next unavoidable world of nothing
I was one of only two white guys there
Shaking my head in horror and sighing sadly
Watching my coworker and friend
Scream and wail her last heartshot goodbyes
“Tell my momma in heaven I love her!”
I said goodbye to her and left
Got into my car ready to navigate unfamiliar urban streets
And as I started the car the stereo roared on
I had been listening to The Pogues
And Shane MacGowan immediately sang sadly and madly
“And there’s mothers crying all over this world
For their poor dead darling boys and girls!”
I couldn’t have put it any better or worse myself
So I drove off
And left black Chicago to just another link in its
Interminable random disgusting disturbing teenage death chain
As the banshees howled on
Low and unstoppable
Behind
Me.
Shot to death by a 15-year-old
Eager to express and act his rage
And make an unimpressive impression
On the hood and city at large
The bullet that tore his victim’s heart apart
Broke and bled his mother’s too
Surely as wrong follows right
I worked beside her at the hospital
And listened to her for a hundred life-shocked hours
Turning the events of that night
Over and over and over again in her insane-pained brain
Trying to figure out something beyond impossible
Why her son was in the park that late
Who took him there when where why why why what ah what the fuck
Not able to outrun the fatal bullet dodging through the dark
Thinking of him lying there cold and dead overnight
Cops on the beat not doing their job should have found him earlier
Should have checked the place but didn’t get out of the car
She frowned and said to me:
“To them he was, excuse my language, just another dead n…”
She stopped short she couldn't even say the word
And then she stopped herself drew back to dignity
And back to choppy internal emotional storms to come
There were no words I could say that would bring her son back
She said to me one time as I nearly cried at her torrents of torment
Told me of her 14-year-old daughter tossing through horror-scratched dreams
Mother not wanting to get close to her not have her hold her hug her
In case she lost her only surviving child as well
She couldn’t handle the thought of that much pain again
She brought in the autopsy report to work
She showed it to me
I don’t know why
I read it too
I don’t know why
It seemed like a insult not to
He lay dead overnight and there were fly-eggs in his hair
Motherfucker nature already doing her pitiless degrading work
On another black casualty of the senseless teenage Chicago street-gun war
I went to the viewing of the body
Looking strange like a waxwork figure somehow
Big gold watch and chains and white suit
Candidate for a job interview in the next unavoidable world of nothing
I was one of only two white guys there
Shaking my head in horror and sighing sadly
Watching my coworker and friend
Scream and wail her last heartshot goodbyes
“Tell my momma in heaven I love her!”
I said goodbye to her and left
Got into my car ready to navigate unfamiliar urban streets
And as I started the car the stereo roared on
I had been listening to The Pogues
And Shane MacGowan immediately sang sadly and madly
“And there’s mothers crying all over this world
For their poor dead darling boys and girls!”
I couldn’t have put it any better or worse myself
So I drove off
And left black Chicago to just another link in its
Interminable random disgusting disturbing teenage death chain
As the banshees howled on
Low and unstoppable
Behind
Me.
THE END
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